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On the day of their immense joy, the bride and groom must connect with the eternal values of the Jewish people. Their personal happiness must be accompanied by prayers for national joy, namely the ingathering of the exiles and the rebuilding of Jerusalem and the Holy Land. How can anyone Jewish experience complete exhiliration without recognizing the pain of the Divine Presence and the Land of Israel? They grieve as long as Jews still live in exile, parts of the Land are still empty of Jews, and the Temple is still in ruins. Therefore, it is precisely when the couple reach the high point of their wedding – under the ĥuppa after the sheva berakhot – that a glass is broken to commemorate the Temple’s destruction, and they declare: “If I forget you, O Jerusalem, let my right hand wither; let my tongue stick to my palate if I cease to think of you, if I do not keep Jerusalem in memory even at my happiest hour” (Psalms 137:5-6).
Jerusalem here represents the pain of the Land, Jerusalem, and the Temple. In fact, this reminds us of all the sorrow in the world. For as long as the Jewish people do not properly rebuild the Land, Jerusalem, and the Temple, the rest of the world also lacks joy, blessing, and peace. By mentioning Jerusalem, the bride and groom transform their personal milestone into a vision of global redemption, and their wedding becomes a stage in the Jewish people's long route to repair and redeem the world.
In Israel, when the verse about remembering Jerusalem is recited, the newlyweds’ parents are reminded of all the previous generations of Jews who could only dream about living in Israel. Their hearts are filled with gratitude for the tremendous privilege of living in Israel and escorting their children to the ĥuppa there. The parents might also feel as if they are at the threshold of a new reality. Until now, the bride and groom were primarily their children. Now they are leaving home and establishing their own home. However, it is a life-affirming separation which will hopefully lead to the growth of their family. This is why the tears parents often shed now are in fact tears of joy.
